the vision...

once upon a time i was a little girl.

i was the ultimate daydreamer.

i longed to grow up.

to fall in love.

to find my place in this big world.

at one time that meant being an ice cream truck driver with a mint green and pink ice cream truck.

i was about 5.

all my ice cream was to be free, just to make all the children i came upon gloriously happy.

source

what can i say?  economics has never been my strong suit.

then i wanted to be a ballerina or a super model.

christy brinkley was my favorite.

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needless to say,

my gifts include neither poise nor killer looks.

then it was a novelist.

i still have copies of my 8 year old penmanship 'novels' about cat families romping through the woods,

and later, girls on trains in which the 1700s and 1900s were a bit muddled.

but i was only 10 or 12.

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and then there was sitting my siblings and friends down ,

pretending i was a teacher and they were to do their lessons on slates.

i was pretty demanding.

as 8th grade came around,

teachers and peers had me almost believing i should be a journalist.

i saw vintage type press and hitchcokish headlines in a daydream bubble.

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then it was an advertising exec. in a high powered office that included cute suit sets, spiked heels and incredible slogans for fortune 500 companies.

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then college was around the corner.

reality had to be faced.

i looked in the mirror knowing i was not, indeed, cut out for cut throat jobs in high rises and smog and traffic.

so i resorted back to something that had always been in the back of my mind.

a teacher.

so i made my plans, applied to the best teaching university in oregon, got accepted and daydreamed some more.

the problem was, i never wanted to teach in a 'regular' school.

i have always been an old soul.

you know that 'real age test' Oprah  pushed years ago?

pretty sure at 10 i would have registered 70.

i daydreamed about teaching multiple grades in a one room school house down a dusty dirt lane.

where the kids would pick warm black berries in the heat of summer and help carry wood in to the wood stove in winter.

perhaps i watched too much anne of green gables.

nope, there can never be too much anne.

but perhaps the 1800s beckoned me a little too crazily in 1999 as a high school senior.

and perhaps not.

maybe, just maybe, God put that dream in spirit all those years ago,

with the exact purpose of preparing my homeschooling heart.

isn't it funny how He works things?

how the dream He gave my heart, that sounded a little odd years ago, now is my daily existence?

the other dream that hasn't died with the rest?

to write.

to become a novelist.

i still write,

though very infrequently.

but through this journey i'm convinced,

if God puts a passion in your heart,

a dream that doesn't burn brightly only to die quickly,

there's a reason for it.

a plan and a purpose in it.

one day maybe i'll be a published author.

or that dream will turn into something else i can't even think of yet,

because it's not my season.

but here i am.

teaching and writing.

i almost feel like i'm 12;)

is there a dream in your heart that has always been there?

that perhaps God intends for more than just a dream? 

and don't worry.

i promise not to come by in my green and pink ice cream truck in run way clothes any time soon.

blessings,

mandy

in case you doubt my dorkiness...

may i reaffirm that for you.

a friend got a dog today.one of his names is jasper.

ahhh, jasper.

this post will forever remind my children how fortunate they were that dad had an opinion on their names.

my top boys names if mr.bossy pants didn't have mercy upon  our children's souls.

boys:

 jasper.

tucker.

{yep, i know. still, i fought hard for this one.}

oliver.

riley

{but then it had to go all over to the girl's side and screw that up.  you know why i liked riley?

because of riley roberts in the t.v. show the torkelsons.  which, apparently, i am the only person in the history of the world to remember} 

and

wait for it...

willoughby.

i never even tried with that one.  he may have died laughing.

girls:

well, my daughter was supposed to be cecily.

i still mourn that name.

avonlea.

{i never brought up that one either, just kept it hidden in my heart til now.  don't you feel fortunate?;)}

josie.

elsie.

{which are not dorky names like my usual}

and elizabeth was always to be my daughter's middle name.

in the end we chose elleanor,

which has the same feel.

so, what did we name our kids?

well, here on the blog we keep that private.

but i will tell you once.

this shall be the only time ever on this here publication.

aiden andrew.

{who is nearly 11 by the way.  we were waaaay ahead of that game;)}

and i still love this name, though he was almost  a noah.

brynna elleanor.

love her middle name.

like her first.

conner ryan.

i thought conner too trendy, but liked it well enough.

have always loved the name ryan.

trevor isaiah.

i really like trevor.  kinda cowboyish.

loathe the name isaiah.

that was all his daddy.

{i'm sorry trev, mommy still loves you}

so, as you can see,

i still put entirely too much thought into names when i shall never bear more children.

but now, my dorkiness is documented for all time,

and my boys will know how close they came to utter humiliation and be indebted to their father for all eternity.

amen.

blessings,

mandy

oh ryan...

via

i don't think i'll ever be sick of these.

seriously.

just thought i'd share.  go to the site , there are so many more!

blessings,

mandy